The calendar flipped to January 2026, and with it, the hopes of the Duke and Duchess of Sussex for a fresh start and a revitalized image. After a tumultuous 2025 filled with business stumbles and critical flops, the expectation was that Meghan Markle would emerge with a polished new strategy. Instead, the new year has ushered in what can only be described as a media apocalypse. In a stunning reversal of allegiance, the gatekeepers of American late-night television—Jimmy Kimmel and Stephen Colbert—have effectively declared open season on the former royal, delivering monologues so scathing, so precise, and so undeniably accurate that they signal the total collapse of Meghan’s protection within the entertainment industry.

For years, there was an unwritten rule in liberal Hollywood circles: Meghan Markle was to be supported, or at the very least, treated with kid gloves. She was the victim of an archaic institution and a hostile British press. But that narrative has completely evaporated. The return of late-night shows this January didn’t bring the usual soft-ball interviews or gentle teasing. It brought a coordinated demolition of Meghan’s character, competence, and credibility.

The Kimmel Hypocrisy Check

Jimmy Kimmel, known for his generally affable demeanor, chose violence for his 2026 premiere. The setup was masterful in its simplicity. He began by discussing “lifestyle gurus” who lecture the public on how to live, lulling the audience into a false sense of security. Then, he queued up a clip from Meghan’s critically panned Netflix series, With Love, Meghan.

In the clip, Meghan is seen in her Montecito kitchen, bathing in soft lighting, preaching about the sanctity of the dinner table. She speaks breathlessly about “creating authentic connections” and “being present with the people you love.” It is the kind of curated, performative warmth that has become her trademark.

Kimmel let the clip play out, allowing the audience to absorb the full weight of her pretension. Then, the camera cut back to him. With a deadpan expression, he looked into the lens and delivered a line that will likely haunt the Sussex brand forever: “That’s beautiful, Meghan. Really touching advice. Quick question, though: When was the last time you had dinner with anyone who actually knew you before you were famous? Your Suits co-stars? Your family? Anyone from your real life? Anyone at all?”

The reaction in the studio was instantaneous and explosive. It wasn’t just laughter; it was a standing ovation. It was a cathartic release from an audience that has silently noted the glaring hypocrisy for years. Kimmel vocalized the elephant in the room: How can someone monetize the concept of “connection” when they have famously discarded every genuine relationship from their pre-fame life? By highlighting this contradiction, Kimmel didn’t just tell a joke; he dismantled the moral foundation of her entire brand.

Colbert’s Competence Attack

If Kimmel went after her heart, Stephen Colbert went for her wallet. The following night, The Late Show host debuted a segment titled “Brands That Nobody Asked For.” The mere inclusion of Meghan in this lineup was an insult, but the content of the segment was a career-ending indictment of her business acumen.

Colbert systematically dissected the embarrassing trajectory of her commercial ventures. He mocked the “American Riviera Orchard” trademark debacle, noting that the patent office rejected it for being too geographically descriptive—a rookie mistake that forced a humiliating rebrand to “As Ever.” He ridiculed the infamous jam launch, joking that the product sold out only because she seemingly made a mere dozen jars to send to celebrity acquaintances who didn’t even want them.

But the lethal blow came when Colbert addressed the Spotify fallout. It has been years since the deal collapsed, but the industry has not forgotten. Colbert reminded his viewers that Meghan was paid millions to produce a podcast—essentially, to sit in a room and speak. “How bad do you have to be at your job,” Colbert asked, “to get fired from talking?”

The audience erupted. This struck a nerve because it moved beyond celebrity gossip into the realm of professional incompetence. Meghan has spent years cultivating an image of a hard-charging CEO and a determined feminist leader. Colbert stripped that away to reveal the reality: a content creator who cannot create content. By framing her failures not as bad luck, but as a lack of work ethic and talent, Colbert destroyed her credibility with the very demographic she needs to survive—the educated, liberal elite.

The “As Ever” Rebrand and the Pattern of Failure

The comedic attacks highlighted a disturbing pattern that has defined Meghan’s post-royal life: the endless cycle of rebranding. As Kimmel pointed out, she tries on identities like costumes. First, she was the actress, then the modernizing princess, then the humanitarian victim, then the podcast host, and now, the domestic goddess.

None of these identities have stuck because, as the late-night hosts brutally observed, none of them feel real. The transition from “American Riviera Orchard” to “As Ever” is emblematic of this chaos. A successful brand, like Martha Stewart’s or Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop, is built on a foundation of genuine expertise or a distinct, authentic lifestyle. Meghan’s brands feel like marketing exercises in search of a personality.

The timeline of failure is staggering. The Netflix show With Love, Meghan premiered in March 2025 and was savaged by critics as a substance-free vanity project. Ratings were abysmal. This followed the Spotify cancellation and the podcast that failed to generate a second season. When you line up these disasters, as the comedians did, the conclusion is inescapable: the “Meghan Markle Effect” is not a golden touch; it is a kiss of death for commercial projects.

Harry: The Tragic Sidekick

Perhaps the only thing sadder than the dismantling of Meghan was the collateral damage inflicted on Prince Harry. In the monologues, he was reduced to a prop—a “hype man” for failing ventures. The comedy surrounding Harry isn’t that he is a villain; it’s that he is a tragedy. He traded his position as a senior royal and a military veteran to become a background character in a cooking show that nobody watches.

Kimmel and Colbert highlighted the absurdity of his fall. He left his country and his family to find “freedom,” only to end up trapped in a cycle of promoting jam and listening to his wife’s scripted platitudes about authenticity. The implication is that he sacrificed everything for a dream that has turned into a commercial nightmare.

The End of the Victim Narrative

What makes this week in January 2026 so significant is the source of the fire. Meghan is well-versed in defending herself against the “racist” British press or the “jealous” Royal Family. She has a playbook for that. She knows how to position herself as a martyr against institutional bias.

But there is no playbook for being laughed at by Jimmy Kimmel and Stephen Colbert. These are not right-wing commentators; they are the voices of liberal America. They are the people who defended her during the Oprah interview. When they turn on you, it means the culture has turned on you.

Their mockery validates the public’s skepticism. It tells the audience, “You aren’t crazy for thinking this is fake. We see it too.” Once a celebrity becomes a punchline in this specific way—mocked for incompetence and phoniness rather than scandal—recovery is nearly impossible. You can rehabilitate a reputation damaged by scandal; you cannot rehabilitate a reputation destroyed by laughter.

No Way Back

As the dust settles on this brutal week, the question remains: Where does Meghan go from here? The strategy of “rebranding” has been exposed as a sham. Her business ventures are fodder for late-night comedy bits. Her professional reputation is in tatters.

The standing ovations that accompanied Kimmel and Colbert’s takedowns prove that the public is exhausted. They are tired of the lectures, tired of the hypocrisy, and tired of the endless promise of content that never delivers. January 2026 was supposed to be a new beginning. Instead, thanks to the ruthlessness of American comedy, it looks like the end. The curtain has been pulled back, the wizard has been exposed, and Hollywood is finally admitting that there is nothing there.